The Sicilians that I have met so far simply do not stress about things. I am not saying they don’t worry because they do, they all have bills to pay and need food to add to the table and for some there is very little of either coming in. What I mean is that they do not stress about getting things done, things they cannot control, there is no rushing, there is no urgency. Believe for someone coming in and wanting things done ‘yesterday’ this can be very frustrating, but when you begin to work with them rather than against them your take on life, on things, on time, become quite different.
If you want a job done quickly then you are likely to be disappointed. If they say Monday, they will mean Monday but not necessarily which Monday. If they say they will be there at 9am, they may well be but be prepared for the fact that it is likely that they won’t. This is not because they are unreliable, far from it, but because they do not have the same sense of urgency as other countries, in my case, as the UK. In the UK it was all rush and bump and doing, here it is “piano, piano” (slowly). Everything gets done, just not at great speed. At first this drove me mad, but I soon learnt the only one stressing was me and nothing was being achieved as that didn’t get anything done any faster. Now I know it will get done…eventually.
So why? Some things will stem from the weather – when it is the height of summer you simply cannot do anything with speed and you work early, rest in the middle of the day and work and have fun into the night – it is quite normal to hear even the youngest children playing out at 11 pm because that is when their parents are out for dinner. Some things will stem from their faith, which for many is deep and strong and they trust that life will treat them well. For others there is simply a quietness about them, a gentleness, like a deep breath that has been taken but only released very slowly. They work the land… and there it is… they work the land.
Most people here have land of some sort, even in the larger towns you can see small allotments outside an apartment block. A small piece of land will contain a few trees, giving fruit throughout the year, or providing olives which are sold in October/November, vegetables which go first to the table and then to the shops who buy local or maybe it will house chickens for eggs and meat.
I have very quickly discovered that when you work the land, time is somehow altered, thoughts are parked and usually left forever where you parked them, and you breathe, the deepest breaths you will ever take. Your focus is the hole you are digging or the plant you are placing in the ground, or the vegetables you are choosing to be cooked later for supper. The sun is on your back, the breeze whispering through the leaves, and there is a sense of total peace in planting, nurturing, or harvesting. If I am talking to an avid gardener then I need not say these things but if you have never grown anything in your life, may I suggest you find a space of earth or window box, and give it a go.
This is not Utopia. Things go wrong. Weather damages what you are nurtured. Tempers flare. But it is always possible to find a small space, a moment in time, a breath, where nothing else matters or even exists and it is you, the earth and nothing more. It is a mindfulness course, a therapist and medication all in one (and no I am not being flippant here, they were once my life), and you learn to slow down, extend time somehow, breathe more deeply, smile at the small things, celebrate the wins, and not worry about things you have no control over. Working on and with the land is one of the best forms of therapy I have ever experienced and that my friend, is why for me, Sicilian’s do not stress life and it is a skill to learn from. It can save your life.
The Barefoot Farmer 